Lethal Dose

I like to write about bees … and beehives. And “Spirit of the Beehive.”

Previous studies revealed Asian honeybees can kill hornets by completely engulfing them, making the predators die from the heat inside the ball of bees — a strategy dubbed “thermo-balling.”

However, Oriental hornets are theoretically resistant to thermo-balling, adapted as they are to the hot and dry climate of Cyprus. Although the heat inside a thermo-ball can reach 111 degrees F (44 degrees C), the heat-resistant Oriental hornet only keels over at temperatures of 122 degrees F (50 degrees C) or more.

Now scientists find Cyprian honeybees can kill hornets by suffocating them, a strategy the researchers have dubbed “asphyxia-balling.”

“The domestic bee has never ceased surprising us,” Arnold said. “Under stressful conditions, honeybees can develop remarkable mechanisms in order to survive.”

Barbara Pepper played Arnold Ziffel’s mother, and we stopped by today to visit her at lunch.

Barbara (Pepper) Enfield’s final resting place.

Barbara as Doris Ziffel on “Green Acres”

and Barbara in her younger days.

Here’s Green Acres in French (that’s “Les Arpents Verts”)

Oh no! It’s gone.

There’s a small article and pic in the new Vanity Fair of Zsa Zsa and the Prince, but the real juicy stuff is at VF Online. Leslie Bennetts must have had a hell of a time keeping a straight face. She probably had to borrow some of Zsa Zsa’s botox:

Another claimed that, according to his stepdaughter Francesca, von Anhalt first told Zsa Zsa he had been robbed by three aliens, but she “told him to say it was three humans, because people would think he was crazy.”

This coming from the woman who played The Queen of Outer Space!

Here’s the naked Prince:

and here’s some Z from 1969:

“I don’t vish to vork like this!”

“I hate that qveen!”

Howie and I have now been trading via text message. It’s sad, really, because you realize you’re inundated with vanity plates and you have to choose the “best” ones. The horror!

LOBSTR1 (hmm - a “Tingler” fan?)

why bother with personal ads when you can use your car? Howie spotted this:
I (HEART)2KUOUT (either that, or he … removes hearts?)

then this AM i saw a response:

OK Y NOT

this one would be in the “anything goes” column - tho it was an out-of-state plate, i kid you not:
FISTER

Maybe this one likes to peep on him:
GUYSPY

I saw Superman at Bed, Bath and Beyond on Saturday:
U2CNFLY

Too bad he didn’t apprehend
LOV LIL
as her hag daughter shoved a shopping cart in an empty spot before speeding away.

oh, the glamorous life of a court reporter!
RPTINCRT

That’s almost as bad as those “I support Cops” stickers that people use in vain hopes of getting out of a speeding ticket.

Mavis’ response to the last round of CClomps was too good to leave in the comments section:

Not limited to LA, hon! I’ve seen:

SHAGGR (and variations on that theme–it is NC, after all!)

MPOTNT ( I told you about this one–why advertise your flaccid state?)

Oh, and the stick figure families have made it here too. My FAVORITE one was in Myrtle Beach on the back of a mini-van. The usual line-up, complete with dog and cat, BUT “daddy’s” head was missing and a big X went over his “body”! I cackled at the bitter ex wife having to ferry around her brats, while ex hub was probably spending the child support cash at the video poker machines and titty bars of MB!

Tells 911 he killed mother-in-law over voodoo dust

Eulabelle Moore knows!

A sprinkle of “voodoo dust” sent a Brooklyn man into a homicidal rage - leading him to beat his girlfriend’s mother to death with a pipe, authorities said yesterday.

“I just killed my mother-in-law,” the suspect, Joseph Cazeau, 48, told cops Monday night after calling 911, according to a police source.

“She was trying to hex me,” Cazeau claimed, a source said.

Cazeau was arguing with 61-year-old Marie Tertel at 9:30 p.m. in the Crown Heights home they shared when she threatened to use “voodoo dust” on him, a police source said.

Before she could hex him, he grabbed a pipe and repeatedly bashed her face and head, the source said. Investigators found Tertel lying facedown in the St. Johns Place house. She died at the scene. Loved ones denied that Tertel was a voodoo priestess, calling her a religious woman who attended a Christian church. The Crown Heights house is owned by the victim’s daughter Marie Luzincourt, who was not home at the time of the killing.

“We have family trouble,” Luzincourt said yesterday.

Above: Family trouble from “The Horror of Party Beach.”

what is a cooley clomp? named after spade cooley, my favorite western swing musician who stomped his wife, ella mae, to death.

cooley clomps of the week

When Step and I came up with the idea of the “Cooley Clomp” (he named it as I started listing the offensive LA license plates I see every day), I had no idea it would just get worse… Now, I just keep a running list in my car… Here’s the latest batch of clompees:

9/13/07:

FILMHAK (well, at least you admit you’re a hack)

MUSTCR8 (must crate? are you in the packing and shipping business?)

***

let’s start w/ our old favorite, and original - spotted at least twice on sunset:

N2 ARTZ

and another hip use..of the number two:

Z FAN2C (an ancient Z28 w/its “hip in 1982″ plate)

it’s all about me - and i want you to know!:

N2 WHIMS (shudder)

FASHBL 8.. (w/requisite white tiny dog out driver’s side window)

PPRNSLT

GAS..<3..JAZ..(poor Jaz, and i sure wouldn’t brag about it).. –damn, i keep inserting a “heart symbol” but it won’t show up.

DIE DAME (german? or a horror flick babe?)

the sherman oaks ubermoms:

SUPRMOM

SWMI MMI

the karma police:

UR ME RU.. (i am NOT you, motherfucker!)

DONH8ME.. (who is don, and why does he hate you?)

through the obvious, darkly:

TRAFIK (no!)

MEEOMY

and the best of all: the PROFESSIONALS:

DMD AMA (yeah, so?)

CAST BY (an old toyota - and you wonder why you haven’t gotten work!)

and this one, which took me..a minute, but only in LA:

DR_SUER

..

cooley clomp award of the day

THUGNO2

i’ve seen this guy a few times. he also has “squidward” on his back window.

cooley clomp award of the day

KUL WIP

I(HEART)2PR4M

at first i thought it read, “i love to perm” and hoped it was an outdated hairdresser. maybe a pornstar. it got me thinking, though. what if i made a vanity plate based on some of my favorite things? don’t they turn down some of them? once i saw one that read WHITEPWR driven by a skinhead. how did that make it? maybe next year i should get creative and join the rest of my fellow angelenos with a “learn about me!” plate. but there’s nothing i want as a tagline, to follow me around. the only thing i can think of is one of my favorite film noirs:

BORN2KILL

or maybe

KSSOFDTH?

the other thing that really annoys me are the ‘family’ stick-figures that are popping up on minivans with the entire family and their names. who cares?! i don’t care about your damned family! i want to make one of the manson family: ‘Charlie’ ‘Sadie’ ‘Tex’ ‘Squeaky’ etc. i bet no one would notice.

today:
ZENBABE
two suspects: blonde in “yoga teacher” gear w/chinese symbols on back of neck (most likely), or “larger, lovelier woman” in vaguely asian printed clothing (as i call it, “pier-one-buddhist,” as in “my house is early pier-one-buddhist … but now that i’m into kabbalah i’m redecorating.”)

Thank god for The Smoking Gun, where today’s “It’s a John Waters World” comes from. You can’t make this stuff up! And he wins, handsfeet-down, the Best Mugshot Ever award.

SEPTEMBER 11–Meet Carlton Davis. The Minnesota man, 26, is facing felony charges for allegedly stealing a cell phone and purse from a woman he mugged on a St. Paul street early Saturday morning. According to police, after the woman turned over her belongings, Davis announced, “Now I’m going to suck your feet.” Which he did, after the 24-year-old victim removed her shoes. Davis, who fled when passersby approached, was apprehended by cops a few blocks from the crime scene. He was booked into the Ramsey County lockup, where the below mug shot was snapped. (1 page)

The AP wrote it almost as funny:

ST. PAUL (AP) — Police said a man who robbed a woman of her keys and cell phone then took off her shoes and licked her toes. Commander Kevin Casper said the attack was “weird sexual behavior.”

I would say weird all around, wouldn’t you?

And the CBS local adds in another detail:

The victim told police that she was too shocked and scared to do anything. Davis then tried to suck her neck but as he approached her some people walked by and he took off.

Howie Pyro noted this remarkable resemblance:

(thanks, Howie!)

From today’s Telegraph:

Put yourself on a 6in pedestal

As the dreaded but comfy Croc threatens to take over the world, Camilla Morton calls for high heels to be worn always and everywhere… and says the pleasure far outweighs the pain

Why do otherwise sane, normal women allow themselves to go out in public wearing what looks like the remains of a cycle helmet on their feet?

Elongate your legs with high heels
Stand tall: remember high heels are a secret weapon against any rivals

The continued popularity of Crocs is a huge mystery to me. Clearly they will never flatter anyone. Of course they’re comfortable, but isn’t that a bit of a cop-out for the committed follower of fashion? Apparently not.

Take a look at the feet around you and I’ll bet you’ll see a whole range of horribly sensible shoes. Yes, your chiropodist (and your mother) might approve of all those biker boots and ballet flats, but where’s the glamour, where’s the mystique?

With London Fashion Week approaching, now’s the perfect time to throw comfort to the wind and strap on a completely fabulous pair of high heels.

If I had my way, I’d ban dress-down Fridays and have everyone dressing up like it’s Friday night every day. And dressing up, for me, means ditching the flat shoes.

Since writing the book How to Walk in High Heels, I have felt duty bound to practise what I preach. In my six-inch stilettos I keep my head held high and my eye on the goal. They are my shot of confidence and secret weapon against any rivals.

Camilla, my girlfriends and I completely agree. Stop the Croc!

Crocs? Did someone say Crocs?

The Fluff is coming! The Fluff is coming!

Sadly, Fluff is not found in CA. Using the “Fluff Finder” feature only brought this:

The Fluff Finder

Just gotta have a Fluffernutter, or something else that can only go with Fluff? Here’s where you can get some dee-lishus Fluff, at a location near you!

Great news! We found 1 location in CA!

Sports Fuel Distributing Laguna Hills, CA

Sports Fuel Distributing? Are you sure? Well, I’m lucky, because someone just sent me some, and it’s on the way. Fluffernutters by the weekend. Yay!

“Long a staple of playgrounds, after-school snacks, college dorms, and the local diner, a Fluffernutter is a wonderful concoction of Marshmallow Fluff and peanut butter in a delightfully tasty sandwich!”

I was on the phone at work when my two crazy-cat-coworkers asked me “Who that sissy cartoon - exit stage left! - is” … I scribbled “Snagglepuss” on a post-it and held it up, and sure enough, I can hear it coming up on youtube before I’ve even finished the conversation.

Not long after, Apollo Sputnik sent me this clip of Paul Lynde’s ill-fated early 70s sitcom (love how Paul played straight dads) and I realized that Paul was sort of the human incarnation of Snagglepuss. Well, all that and more:

And Smell-O-Vision returns!

PS. “Yoo-hoo! Sissy!” is from the gayest movie of all time, “BOOM.” It made an appearance on the Sundance Channel a few weeks ago - pray that it ends up in regular rotation! Mavis and I saw it years ago at the Brattle Theater in Boston and were crying and choking with laughter not ten minutes into it. It’s almost impossible to describe it - yes, words do fail me. We first heard about it from John Waters. Here’s the wiki and some funny IMDB user comments.