Lethal Dose

today near Clinton, NC. photos by Mavis Martini.

Now, he’s a “proposed” Saint. How do you do that? Do they have a little wooden box at the Vatican that you can fill with ideas?

Saint Isidore of Seville Sanctus Isidorus Hispalensis
Proposed Patron Saint of Internet Users

(c.560 - 636)

A Prayer before Logging onto the Internet and the Catholic Online Forum (which is where i found this.)

Almighty and eternal God,
who created us in Thy image and bade us to seek after all that is good,
true and beautiful,
especially in the divine person of Thy only-begotten Son,
our Lord Jesus Christ,
grant we beseech Thee that,
through the intercession of Saint Isidore,
bishop and doctor,
during our journeys through the internet we will direct our hands and eyes only to that which is pleasing to Thee
and treat with charity and patience all those souls whom we encounter.
Through Christ our Lord.
Amen

I love the Whip! now, now, i know what you’re thinking. and even though i love the sound of a cracking whip (there’s just something about it!), it’s not that kind of whip i’m talking about. i’m talking about THIS:

whipped fatty?

oh yes, you remember them alright … and only a company named “Mengels” could invent them because that’s pretty much what happened to your neck after you rode one. these sadists started off with a kiddie version, to get you acclimated to being whipped around frantically and react with joy:

if you google it you can find lots of nice photos and a bit of history. they’ve been around for ages, so whatever genius came up with the thought of spinning people around a track at a fast speed so their necks snap like a whip while their stomach lurches had the right idea! and so a generation of pepto-bismol slugging future masochists begins.

somewhere in NC.

photo by Mavis Martini.

last night. Howie’s DJing, playing the “Perry Mason” theme.

Two PR chicks next to me. Tacky blonde and equally tacky brunette.

“Know what time the band goes on?” (Said band is Jeff Goldblum’s jazz band. I kid you not. He’s the new Milton DeLugg!)

Helpful me points out, “no, but if you look you can see they’re setting up.” Hellllllo.

Blonde says to brunette, “Yeah, too much of a hardcore-rock scene here, I gotta chill out for some jazz.”

The Perry Mason theme.

Friars Club decor: Satan or Martha Raye?

I actually had this Milton DeLugg record - Mavis found it. His wikipedia entry says he produced “Rave On” and co-wrote “Orange Colored Sky” - wow! Now I’m sorry I compared Jeff Goldblum to him - what an insult to the accomplished Mr. DeLugg.

Mr. DeL is alive and well - why didn’t they get him for the Friars gig?

Delugg also composed and conducted incidental music for a series of childrens recordings of tales by the Brothers Grimm produced by RCA and Golden Books around 1966-67.

I had those - I loved them! There would be a little “beep” sound to tell you when to turn the record over (for the slower readers, I imagine.)

this week’s theme is cannibalism. it really should be rupert holmes (someone did submit the pina colada song) but he’s not worthy of an entire blog.

fadista sent this and I don’t know how i don’t know it! she writes:

“OK, I think we discussed this song in the past. It came out in 1971 by a group called The Buoys (ow) and was written by Rupert Holmes, who went on to freak us all out with The Piña Colada Song.”

You can listen to a bit of this atrocity
here.

Timothy

Trapped in a mine what had caved in
And everyone knows the only ones left
Were Joe and me and Tim
When they broke through to pull us free
The only ones left to tell the tale
Was Joe and me.

Timothy, Timothy, where on earth did you go?
Timothy, Timothy, God why don’t I know?

Hungry as hell no food to eat
And Joe said that he would sell his soul
For just a piece of meat
Water enough to drink, to drink for two
And Joe said to me, “I’ll take a swig
And then there’s some for you.”

Timothy, Timothy, Joe was looking at you
Timothy, Timothy, God what did we do?

I must have blacked out just ’round then
‘Cause the very next thing that I could see
Was the light of the day again
My stomach was full as it could be
And nobody ever got around
To finding Timothy
Timothy…

”

Eve Golden sends us “Jo-Jo the Cannibal Kid,” which is more of a novelty song, but cannibalism nonetheless. For those of you who got my email about my neighbor, doncha think he’s a shoo-in for the music video?

Who’s the talk at every table,
From Chicago to Madrid?
Who’s the African Clark Gable?

Jo-Jo, the Cannibal Kid!

Other tribes eat roots and berries,
He’s the one that never did—
He prefers his missionaries—
Jo-Jo, the Cannibal Kid!

He can always pass on his manners and his savoir faire
Mix with every class—eats the finest people everywhere!

Circuses send offers daily,
Bertram Mills made him a bid—
But he’s holding out for Barnum Bailey—
Jo-Jo, the Cannibal Kid!

and no lyrics here, but have a listen to Fido is a hot dog now!